Iran has a wonderful history of making bold military claims without backing them up in any way, shape, or form. They also have a history of colossal screw-ups and outdated equipment. Today though, those two forces came together to meet, have firm handshakes all around, and then definitely drink too much, in the form of this incredibly blue submarine.
Why a blue submarine?
Click to Embiggenate
I don’t know why it took me this long, and I’m definitely sure I’m not the first. But hold on you guys. YOU GUYS. New game. Go to the Craigslist barter section and see if you can find the most weirdly specific items for trade. The most specific trade wins.
Finally! Something to cater to the marihuana community, besides Taco Bell. And Totino’s Pizza Rolls. And Hot Pockets. And Snickers bars. And Doritos. And Mtn Dew. Yes, finally!
Jack in the Box is now selling “Munchie Meals,” which starts out as fries, two tacos, and a drink, and then goes on to include such delights as the “Stacked Grilled Cheeseburger,” with is a grilled cheese, with a cheeseburger sutured on to it.
Pot joke pot joke pot joke, America joke.
See more at the Huffington Post’s Grub Grade.
That opening paragraph says it all. According to a report from the Korean Central News Agency, the state news agency of the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea, they have discovered the lair of the unicorn rode by the “Holy King of the East.”
Men in the Middle East are just so, so desperate for that perfect ‘stache. One to stroke, one to pet, one to catch soup. In the perfect quest to resemble the perfect Man, men in that part of the world (excluding Israel, I’m gonna go ahead and just guess that) are increasingly turning to mustache transplants. As one Turkish doctor says about his clients:
“My impression is more and more they want to establish their male aspect,” he said. “They want a strong mustache.”
Yes, a Strong Mustache for a Strong Man. Apparently, the soup-catcher is so important in the Middle East that it has even invaded the most highly revered aspect of Middle Eastern StrongMen (strong man, Strong Man, get it, zing?):
In 2008, militants in Gaza abducted a Fatah opponentand shaved off his mustache to dishonor him, while in 2003, in the lead up to the Second Gulf War, Izzat Ibrahim al-Douri — a senior aide to Hussein and, like the rest of the former Iraqi leader’s inner circle, himself mustachioed — created headlines when he yelled “Curse be upon your mustache!” at a Kuwaiti counterpart at an emergency summit of Islamic states.
I’m surprised this hasn’t caught on in Williamsburg.
Read more at CNN.
Starting with the launch of Britain’s Got Talent and America’s Got Talent, one of Simon Cowell’s many repetitive reality talent show series, every country in the world now has their own edition of Got Talent. But they might as well cancel them all tomorrow, because nobody in the anglosphere or elsewhere will come close to Rachel Aspe, from La France a un incroyable talent.